Today my kid was invited to a birthday party and I barely managed to convince him to go to the place and check it out as there will be pizza and cake. He said seriously: Ok, but we give the present and we leave. Silly me, I thought that once we are there he will change his mind. We go, we reach the mall where the party was held and my mind was thinking: ‘So much noise and the music is so loud, I hope he stays here and I can go to some quiet place.’
And surprise, he gives the present and then says: ‘Now, we go’. I tried to convince him to stay while his colleagues from kindergarten were arriving, but I had no chance. So, we left and on our way home I saw that there was still time to catch the usual Sunday puppet show and he said he wants to go easily and fast. We reach the place and it was crowded and Hori explains to me the difference between this crowd and the mall crowd : ‘This is ok because we are here to watch the theatre and all kids will do that and we do not have to play and talk with them.’
So, my kid is shye and anti-social. The patient has a diagnose and with Roxi and Google I will surely be able to work on it.
I’ve then talked with my sister and told her about the party and theatre and with no surprise she says: ‘And why are you amazed by this? You did the same all your childhood and even as a teenarger. Just ask Mum!’
Shit, shit, shit! She was right! Mum used to force her to take me to parties and force me to go to her parties and we both hated her for different reasons. I’ve been an anti-social human being all my life. I like to call it socially challenged 🙂
I’ve passed over the shyness in time, but the social challenge is there and I even like it. I have made NO friends since we moved to our new home (2 years ago), I have made around 3 good friends from all my job places (for the past 11 years), I have kept close contact with almost NONE of the school or faculty colleagues, I very rarely go to company parties, my very very very few best friends are as anti-social as me and we talk only when we need to do real information transfer…
How the hell did this get transfered to my child?
Maybe cause we visit only one friend with kids ( which happens to be one of my anti-social best friends), we generally do not make visits, we do not play in the park with other kids, we do not go to parties and stuff like that, we do not seek human company in weekends and in the afternoon we’d rather go bicycle or do creative activities indoor than play with the other kids in the park.
Do I even want to change this?
As an adult I am perfectly happy with me, because I got used to it. As a kid it was not easy, especially as a teenager, so probably I am ‘forcing’ my kid into a way of being that is not the best for him. If I have to do all the above activities to show him another way..that is extremely difficult for me..
If he stays as pretty as he is now, reads some books and shows some intelligence and grows a big enough dick he will be fine as a mysterious anti-social guy. Chicks love these guys! 😉 Look at the guy from the Twilight Saga.. he was also a vampire..maybe that helped a bit…
I just have to convince him to do some sports in order to also look good. Maybe the ones done individually: like swimming: You cannot talk while swimming, it’s just you and the water!