Since I’ve taken up the new job I’ve been coping with 2 realities that keep circling my head.
My first reality is that you never know if what you do is right. Even if you gather as much information as possible and ask as many opinions as possible, you never know if you are going to do good or not. There are so many uncertainties and unknowns in the people equation that you just never know. Since January I play in my head a continuous melody: “Fake it, till you make it”. I think I will sing it for as long as I do this job, as everything is changing all the time.
My second reality is that people start to see me as a manager. I see it happening when discussions stop when I arrive on the hole-way. Also when I drop a joke that normally would be picked up and continued, but now silence sets in. I thought new roles do not change people, I think I was foolish. Maybe they do not change the people, but surely they change their behavior, as they react to the change the way others relate to them and to what they think it is required from their position. It can be good change or bad change, I have no idea what drives direction.
And to close this strange stream of thought I read something today and it felt good: “Fight as if you’re right. Listen as if you’re wrong”. I will fake this until I make it 😉